


lethologica

by fivegays



Category: Polygon/McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: First Meetings, M/M, Soulmates, its only rated T because there's swearing and MCR, this is really just the start of the start of a relationship n i... may continue this au? shrugs !
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-23
Updated: 2019-06-23
Packaged: 2020-05-16 22:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19326946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fivegays/pseuds/fivegays
Summary: The word is stupid, Pat decides under his blankets that night. It’s not like the hushed whispers of his friends gossiping about their first words- they got cool words, like sequoias and discombobulate, words that no one ever uses, words that would be easy to point out when you heard them.Pat got polygon.





	lethologica

**Author's Note:**

> from a request: patbri, soulmate??  
> i realize that i catered DIRECTLY to ashley on this one but hey. my hands ran away from me i don't know where they are

Pat’s life thus far is a string of events.

Birth, obviously. Need that one. Birthdays pass, friends come and go, rocks thrown and kids kicked under a swing set. Normal childhood ruckus. He gets harmless crushes before he knows what it all means, enjoys the simple sweet of swinging across monkey bars with someone he liked. Teenagedom, dramatic as always, filled with too many hours in his room blaring MCR through his headphones and praying for the noise to stop. Too many shaking hands reaching for other shaking hands, eyes meeting and departing until one of them has the guts to lean in enough for their brains to scream  _ they’re gonna kiss me. I’m gonna kiss them. _

None of them were ever right, always left Pat feeling like he was missing a tooth, unable to stop searching for what was missing.

The discovery of your soulmate’s first word around you was a magical, revered time. They discussed it in philosophy classes, what made you hear their first word, whether it was environmental effects that brought it to you, whether you and your soulmate found it at the same time. Always speculation, he thought.

Pat finds his word in his dark bedroom, between songs on a lonely night- when he might have needed it  _ most _ , grown up Pat would rationalize, but teenage Pat takes it as another kick in the ribs. He can barely make it out, from whatever part of his subconscious it comes from, and as soon as he hears it, he’s alone again. The solitude post-word feels crushing, like his bedroom walls are closing in on him and the lights are off and his headphones are screaming  _ I think I'd love to die alone, I think I'd love to die alone  _ and before his brain can catch up with his body, Pat’s screaming too. His mom rushes upstairs, gives words of comfort he can barely take in as he comes down from the panic of it all. Pat explains he heard  _ the word _ , and his mom hugs him and cries and leaves to tell his father and forgets to come back. So he’s left alone again, ringing in his ears and Gerard’s vocals tinny on the desk in front of him.

The word is stupid, Pat decides under his blankets that night. It’s not like the hushed whispers of his friends gossiping about their first words- they got cool words, like  _ sequoias _ and  _ discombobulate _ , words that no one ever uses, words that would be easy to point out when you heard them.

Pat got  _ polygon _ .

It takes years for Pat to reconcile with it- he completely ignores it for the rest of his teenage years, perfectly content to slip by with his headphones, kiss a few girls that he knows aren’t right just to get the bitterness out of his mouth. He’s not at all perfectly content with it, and he knows that, but that’s a secret he’ll die with, he decides. He opens up a little more in college, kisses more girls and even some boys, because, hey, it’s college and none of these people are actually his soulmate, why does it matter what’s in their pants? The sting never leaves, and Pat feels bad until he realizes these people know he’s not their soulmate earlier. That turns his stomach and he feels shitty for a different reason, because it never ends for him. Perpetually shitty.

He graduates. He should be feeling proud and excited for a new chapter. But all he can think about as he crosses the stage is fucking  _ polygon _ .

By all accounts- all being the one, himself, the account being that the soulmate process is stupid and we live in a simulation, maybe- he shouldn’t have seen the article. He blames it on algorithms, prior searches for video games and related news pieces leading him to this. But he almost scrolls by it, then  _ doesn’t _ , and then he screams in his adult apartment bedroom like he had years ago.

An article for a video game he couldn’t really give less of a shit about, but-

_ Polygon.com. _

He applies as soon as there’s an open spot.

He gets in.

And he’s found the happiness he was looking for after graduation.

He didn’t expect to step in and find his soulmate, and he loves his job here, gets to work on something he enjoys and cares about every day, maybe even make people laugh about a Toad with funny legs.

But- the bitterness comes back, hisses that it’s been two  _ years _ and he isn’t getting any younger. He hates the part of himself that looks in the mirror and sees the bitter old man he’s becoming, the part that’s so scorned by love that he’s decided to throw the whole notion out the window, hasn’t dated in the better part of a year.

He might hate the part that still wants to try more.

\---

They’re looking for a new hire. Pat’s not involved in the process, but knows his coworkers well enough to be informed that they’re looking. He winces a little at the memory of his own interviews, is glad to be in a secure place here. He doesn’t think about it too much in the following weeks, focuses on his work, almost forgets about it until he’s walking back from the bathroom one day. He decides to switch it up, maybe from a need for stimulation in the middle of a workday, or maybe-

He hears quiet speaking from Justin’s desk, and a few people crowded around a monitor. That. Might be what draws him in more than anything. As he gets closer, he hears mumbling about how  _ he’d be a great fit _ and  _ have you seen his other stuff? _ He can’t make out the words coming from the monitor speakers, volume turned down just enough to make it unintelligible for him and courteous to those around them.

He rounds the corner, feet stopping before his brain catches up.

He locks eyes with the man on the screen, suit and tie looking much more formal than he’d been in his cover letter. He watches as he turns in his desk chair, camera cutting to him standing to approach.

The volume of the song kicking in is just loud enough for him to hear-

“-Polygon dot com video producer!”

... _ Fuck. _

**Author's Note:**

> let me know if you want me to continue this !!  
> follow me @les-brian on tumblr for shitposts about AUs before i post them here and also me constantly talking about how handsome pat is


End file.
